Saturday, November 10, 2018

The Ugly

The image above is the very first iteration of the game's environment. It consists of all the Unity Store assets with the tag "school" or "parking" or "street" that I could find. I wanted to get a sense for scale and also see what was available to me in the form of free assets. I also needed a physical space to start implementing functionality that I had promised at the conception of the project. The game has only been in development for three weeks and I am the sole developer. On top of that, I'm not a conventional or classically trained artist. All things considered, this is perfectly acceptable. It's certainly functional and serves its purpose. It's not even what the final game is going to look like.

I'm embarrassed of it and I don't want to let anyone else touch it until I stop seeing how ugly it is. In game development, that really isn't an option. You have to test your game at every opportunity to make sure that it's conveying the right message, players aren't misinterpreting elements, and that it's engaging. So, I'm posting this heinous screenshot in an attempt to overcome the way that I'm feeling.

I think that I'm finding it really difficult to separate myself from this project. The content is so personal and delicate. I feel an immense amount of responsibility to represent the experience perfectly. To make something beautiful, stunning, and provocative. I don't feel like I'm living up to the standard that I set for myself and that feels supremely shitty.

Friday of this week is my first opportunity for official playtesting. Here's to tricking myself into feeling excitement, rather than feeling dread.

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